Monthly Archives: June 2009

FYI

FYI

Acronyms and I really don’t go together.

But at work, I realized there is no looking back from these monstrous abbreviations. It’s just me and them.

It started even before I joined work. One of my editor’s sent me an e-mail saying CM this CM that. I was like, what in the world is CM?

Yeah, it is now obvious that CM stands for Citizen Matters but at that time I just drew a plain blank. It took some time for me to figure it out.

Then I joined work. And there was more in store.

Firstly, I was rechristened VV. The first time I heard it, I cringed! I admit I always felt my first name is extremely long and difficult to spell by many, but to reduce it to a mere VV? And it’s not just me. Almost everyone here at work has been rechristened to these two-letter names. ‘Lets give VV that story!’, they say. I’m yet to get used to mine, don’t know if I ever will.

BTW, these acronyms are not restricted to names. My colleague narrated the following incident to me.

One day, one of the editors’s told one of our writers’s that the other editor is WFH.

Now, you and I may let our imaginations run wild.

It was only after my colleague (who is now used to many months of these killing short forms) told me that WFH is ‘Working From Home’ did I breathe easy.

Almost every other day, some of these are thrown at us. TBD is no killer disease but simply ‘To be Done’. DIY does not stand for anything unmentionable but just ‘Do it Yourself’.

And the list goes on.

We do it right

We do it right

She’s fretting about that lone zit on the nose, because she has a jig at a club tomorrow night. What should she do? ABC cream comes to the rescue. Just apply it and her skin is all fresh and clean, set for the big night.

This is probably just one sort of depiction of a young woman on television. There are thousands more. From the mother who becomes the best mom in the whole world because she uses a particular brand of cooking oil, to a woman who is dumped by a man because she wasn’t fair enough, women are portrayed in this whole gamut of roles. It was always the woman who is multi-tasking. Nothing wrong with that. Multi-tasking is a good thing. But she also ends up being worried about how she looks and how people might perceive her just because she isn’t fair-skinned. It’s always about the looks. Unfortunately. For you to feel that ‘you are worth it’ or to feel ‘like one in a million’, you should use XYZ beauty product.

And it is not just in ads where woman play the central role. What about the ads for vests and briefs? Yeh aaraam ka mamla hai? How low can an ad stoop? You wear this brand of baniyans and you immediately get a woman? Shouldn’t there be a limit to so called ‘creative liberties’?

Even young girls are being sucked into this now. An ad for a soap shows a mother telling her little daughter to go buy a bar of soap. The daughter leaves immediately, when the mother realises that she forgot to tell the little girl which brand of soap to buy. She runs after her, worried to her stomach that her daughter’s confidence will be shattered if she ends up using the wrong brand of soap. She finally gets back home only to find her daughter having a bath with, yeah you guessed it, the right brand of soap. How in the world are you affected by the brand of soap that you use? And that too a little girl? It is outrageously ridiculous.

From wooing women with the latest pressure cookers to using them as mere puppets in men’s deodorants ads, women are used for their outside appearances, all beauty and no brain. It is abominable that women have to stand before you in white tops with their arms raised, showing off their smooth and sweet-smelling underarms.

But it is not just in the world of advertisements. The media itself has a way with dealing with women. When Meira Kumar becomes Speaker at the Lok Sabha, everyone goes ga-ga about it. Why? Because she is doing a so-called man’s job? Agreed that she is the first woman Speaker in the LS. So what allows us to question, analyse and dig into it? She can do the job as well or better than any man who has done it all these years. The same was said when Prathiba Patil became President.

Every college-going, jobless, timepass-indulging young individual would have for sure watched the reality television show ‘Splitsvilla’. I watch it too. I fall in the ‘timepass’ category. I am at a loss of words at the mention of this show. It does not just degrade women but also men. Each one making an absolute fool of herself/himself all for some prize money and the chance to host your own show later. For starters, the entire show’s audio should be reworked to just having beeps throughout. The young women in the show are just out to spoil their own lives with all the drama they are creating themselves. I’m not against wearing minimal clothing. I’m not against reality television. But it’s quite another thing to make a complete joker out of yourself. As a woman, there should be a certain level of decency and sense that you should carry. And shows like this only try to demean women, giving them the opportunity to do so themselves.

There is an obsession to women who are glamorous and wear good clothes. But zero attention is paid to those who have contributed in more productive terms. How many of us know Rakhi Sawant? Your answer is as good as mine. How many of us know Vandana Gopikumar and Vaishnavi Jayakumar? It is ok if you are drawing a blank now. The duo co-founded The Banyan, a trust that works with homeless and metally ill women. But how much do you get to read about their work as much as you read about Rakhi Sawant and her swayamvar?

Like in the US, in India, it may take an Oprah Winfrey to bring about a change. Oprah hasn’t really caused any sort of revolution. But she has changed certain mindsets. You don’t always see her talking about fashion and Hollywood. There’s obviously much more that she does.

Why is it that women are always portrayed as weak, emotional, lenient, soft, compassionate and so on? Why can’t a spade be called a spade? Is it always about appearing beautiful to the other gender? Is it always about saying the right things, worrying about the family, cooking your husband’s favourite dish, mending your daughter’s torn jeans and other such ‘home’ work?

Women should be portrayed for who they are. Not as mere models for an ad campaign. Women are beautiful, no doubt. But that isn’t it. Today’s women don’t fall for Amul’s baniyan or faint at the scent of Axe. Today’s women don’t harp about Prestige cooker or Sundrop cooking oil.

An ad for a liquid washing soap shows the wife telling the husband to wash vessels and then get on with his escapades. That’s the woman of today. Assertive and firm. But still gentle and beautiful.

“Man loves little and often; women much and rarely” reads the status message of an acquaintance. That’s the difference. When we do something, we do it right.

Amar Akbar Anthony – Did BJP steal Congress’s line?

Amar Akbar Anthony – Did BJP steal Congress’s line?

BJP's Amar Akbar Anthony

The Congress may have fielded their Amar Akbar Anthony in Bangalore. But the BJP’s sweep in all the three constituencies seems to have given them the liberty to use the Congress’s community model of Amar Akbar Anthony!

This banner near the Cantonment Railway station is from P C Mohan with best wishes.

The Grand Old Man needs to take a break!

The Grand Old Man needs to take a break!

At 86, this man needs to sit at home and relax. Instead the Kalaignar goes about in his specially designed lazyboy-kind-of-chair-cum-bed thingie. This DMK chief and Chief Minister of Tamil Nadu needs to take it easy. If he isn’t troubling the Chennai police by fasting in some public place, with air coolers and God-knows-how-many-wives accompanying him, he is inaugurating buildings from the comfort of his ‘special’ chair from his home.

It is ridiculous. I am not for or against this whole new concept of ‘youth in politics’. But Karunanidhi really needs to retire.

And he is actually doing a great job of setting up his ever-so-unending family. His demands from the UPA were simply outrageous. The number of cabinet berths he was demanding were increasing by the hour. And he still managed to get something for members of his family. The biggest disaster of it is Azhagiri. The biggest crook in the family and probably in Chennai. Now the new Union Minister of Chemicals and Fertilizers. I may now think twice before consuming food, because god knows what he is going to do to the fertilizer industry. Azhagiri was earlier in the news with regard to the murder of a DMK minister. He even came under fire when the Dinakaran party office was attacked by his supporters in Madurai. Dinakaran is run by the Maran family, relatives of Karunanidhi.

Next comes Kanimozhi, daughter of Karunanidhi’s wife Dayaluammal. She comes across as a more sensible person and could’ve really done a decent job as a Minister.

And then Dayanidhi Maran, the nephew. Previously the IT Minister and now he got the Textile Ministry. God bless, the textile industry is not going to see the same fate as the Chemicals and Fertilizers industry.

Karunanidhi really hit the jackpot. And with trouble-maker son Azhagiri packed off to New Delhi, the path was set for M K Stalin, his brother. Karuna made all the right moves just in time to make his son the Deputy CM, clearly indicating who his choice for successor is. Stalin, by the way, is another on the list of crooks. Like brother, shall we say? Stalin has been arrested several times, the first time being under MISA.

The DMK chief has made headlines all through his life. He recently received flak for his comments about slain LTTE chief Prabhakaran, when he said “Prabhakaran is my friend”.

Then, there was the midnight arrest drama. For all of us who watched it on TV, it was thorough entertainment. On the morning of 30th June 2001, we all woke up to the scenes of Karunanidhi screaming for help! It was outrageously funny. Here you have a man, in his usual white veshti, white shirt, yellow shawl and dark glasses, screaming and shouting. The arrest was made based on a complaint lodged by the then Chennai Corporation Commissioner J C T Acharyalu about the alleged losses of Rs 12 crore in the construction of mini-flyovers in Chennai. Even as the family-owned Sun Network telecast the arrest video, people like me had doubts about it being ‘staged’. It was an unforgettable morning!

With so much drama in his life, the grand old man seems to only want more.

Why can’t he just sit at home and write poetry?

Or give some company to his gazillion wives? I’m sure he doesn’t spend much time with them, with all the action he always seems to be involved in.

The other day, NDTV showed a graphical representation of Karunanidhi and his family tree! This was real heights! But it was a nicely presented graph and gave us a clear picture of which wife is whose mother and so on.

But enough is enough.

Karuna, please take a break. Read some poetry to your wives. Give them some of your time. After all, each one must love you so much to allow you to have the two other wives.

Are the rain gods listening?

Are the rain gods listening?

The monsoons have arrived. And I am dreading it. No, it isn’t like I hate rains or something. It’s romantic and all to sit by your window, watching the raindrops fall and sipping a cup of steaming hot tea. The smell of the mud. Getting your hands wet. Hot and spicy pakodas. It’s all fine to sit at home and imagine yourself to be in a Nicholas Sparks novel. But get onto the streets and the nightmare begins.

As a two-wheeler rider, I am always very careful on the road during the rains. I ride slowly, try to avoid the slush and potholes, praying and hoping not to get any muddy water on myself. But I have realised not everyone thinks that way. Other motorists seem to love to get into to water-filled potholes, giving a bath to those riding close by. It’s ridiculous. Everyday, I make a conscious effort to ride slowly across potholes so as to not splash water on others, but I end up getting some on myself because of some other moron. I avoid wearing white and other light coloured clothes. I even avoid wearing some better looking clothes that I own. All because of the fear of getting some dirty slush on me.

Are the rain gods listening??